9 Months Post-Op

Three months have passed since my last post, and not that much has changed. The cortisone shot that I had didn't do anything. Bad News: I received no relief from the pain. Good News: That means the pain isn't coming from my hip joint. It was good to know that I could stop worrying about the actual hip joint and focus on the muscles around my hip. Through regular massage via the amazing Jessica (intuitivelotus.com) and tennis ball humping I was as close to pain-free as I've been since before the tear. A week or so before Thanksgiving I was feeling so much better that... I started running. Yes! Running! I ran a mile in 15 minutes or so, ok... that's not running that's "jogging" or whatever, but in any event I was going in a forward direction faster than walking. Muscle memory is incredible. Although I hadn't ran in a year I felt my body moving as though only a few weeks had passed. I had to keep slowing myself down. My whole body tingled with glee on that first "run". I ran again that week, two miles in one week after almost a year of zero.

On Thanksgiving, with my boyfriend's family acting supportive but worried, I went out into the freezing rain and ran a mile. It felt awesome although it was simultaneously freezing. Unfortunately the next day I went to the gym, and I pushed myself a little too far. I'm not mad at myself. I have to relearn my boundaries every day. Every day is a test of what I can and can't do. There is no clear forward/linear direction in this healing process. (I will get to more of that later.) So I overdid it at the gym not running (I stopped when I was starting to have the old shooting pains, my hip had had enough.) but with tiny stupid weights. I was trying to strengthen my back and triceps to prepare for swimming again. I am completely useless in the water unless I have built up my arms and back. I ended up pulling the muscle that runs along the bottom of the scapula; so badly in fact that I had to take muscle relaxers and sit with a heating pad on my back for a week. After several days of using the heating pad, then doing the yoga pose plow, my back returned to normal – but my hip returned to a near constant state of pain. I'm sure the fact that I pulled a muscle that is right next to where my psoas connects to my spine did not help my situation.

I went to a follow-up appointment with my orthopedic a few weeks ago. Luckily (or not so luckily) the pain in my groin was flaring pretty bad that morning. I made my doctor feel where I was experiencing the pain. The thing with orthos is, no matter how great they are, they are concerned with bones and joints, that's it. The surrounding muscle and fascia could be on the moon for all they care. Once he felt where the muscle was pulling he had a very surprised expression on his face. "It's... it's like a cord! That's... impressive!" "That's not impressive," I responded, "it f*cking hurts!" He decided to refer me to Dr.Orefice at Active Health. I went to my first appointment with Dr.Orefice last week. He decided that he will mostly be using ART or Active Release Techniques to help my psoas calm down and break up scar tissue. I really hope that this is finally the procedure I need to break up the sh*t residing in my hip. During the first visit, even though it was painful I felt that he was getting to the major sources of my pain. OK, so what is ART and how does it work?

From Active Health's website:
"ART providers utilize highly developed tactile skills and knowledge of physiological symptom patterns to locate scar tissue adhesions on and in between muscles and nerves. A precise hand or thumb contact is applied to the correct area (tension to the tissue) and the recipient is directed to move the effected region of the body through a specific range of motion (muscle is shortened then lengthened). This causes the muscles to slide under the ART providers contact. This technique has proven to rapidly break up scar tissue and yield recovery of many types of soft tissue pain conditions found in the work place and in sports."

2010 was a long and frustrating year. I've decided that this year, in order to better deal with my pain and anxiety issues I will try to be a more faithful yogi. I came across the book "A Year of Living Your Yoga: Daily Practices to Shape Your Life" by Judith Hanson. As I was searching to see if there were any blogs that reviewed 'A Year of Living Your Yoga', I came across a blog called Yoga Dork. Yoga Dork is just one of the blogs trying to practice yoga daily and put into practice Hanson's daily insights to approaching life and yoga. So I will be trying to do yoga every day, on days where my psoas/hips are really tight I will be practicing my new favorite type of yoga: yin yoga.

I've been doing home practice since most of the yoga classes in this area (at times I'm available) are vinyasa. Though every teacher is different, I've found that most vinyasa classes move too quickly. I've always preferred slower paced yoga, being able to stay in poses and really enjoy their full benefit. I've noticed great improvement in my flexibility since practicing yoga regularly a month or so after the surgery and now. Practicing has made me grateful for how far I've come. Even though I still experience pain, my hip has more flexibility and is able to do more poses without modifications.

I set up an account with MyYogaOnline.com so that I can practice using their videos. MyYogaOnline provides videos of a wide variety of yoga styles. Classes range from a quick 15 minutes to longer hour and a half sessions. They also have pilates videos and guided meditations. This year, besides continuing with grad school, I hope to make further progress in my recovery. It is my intention that through regular yoga practice I can learn to be more patient with my body and regain a higher awareness of its ups and downs, and learn to respect whatever it may be able to do day by day.

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A Mostly Raw Day

Wednesday after swimming I decided to incorporate more raw foods into my diet. In my zombie-like visit to the store yesterday, I stocked up on fruits and veggies.

I started eating a diet focused on raw food last spring. Unfortunately, I found out I was allergic to bell peppers after having major GI problems, and kind of fell off the wagon. It scared me off salad for awhile, since I didn't know what was going on. Then, by the start of winter I had become so stressed out, I was hardly cooking, and, sigh... eating Lean Cuisines.

So yesterday I ate mostly raw. I doubt I'll ever go 100% raw, or ever 100% vegan, but I do believe there are real benefits to those diets/lifestyles. Now, if you look up "raw food diet", you will most certainly run across some pretty insane sounding people. They talk about connecting with their food, being brought to emotional states by vegetables, and feeling energy not previously felt with "cooked food". Their descriptions usually remind me of 'The Ecstasy of St Teresa' by Bernini, as their descriptions of their foodgasms go pretty over the top sometimes.

When I eat raw foods, I definitely feel better, it's nice to eat a meal that's so basic, almost primal in a way. Does my "mega salad" of pears, apples, avocado, baby spinach, romaine and dried cranberries move me to states of ecstasy? Um, no but it tastes damn good, and I love knowing exactly what's in my meal. Do I think all the claims raw foodists make are silly? No, even if at first it's a little strange. With any sort of life choice, there are those who go a little overboard, but I do believe raw food is very nutritious, cleansing, and plant-based diets create positive energy.

After work, I went to spin class. The instructor last night usually teaches on Wednesdays and Fridays. I liked her a lot, and I think I'll make an effort to check out more of her classes. She was very positive but had a very authoritative presence, probably because she teaches middle school. After spin my friend Kelly and I went to "cardio pilates". It was... interesting, not horrible, but not exactly what we expected. The instructor is full of sass and bleach, and I hope I have her energy at her age.

Then, after we were done swinging body rings around in pilates, I taught Kelly some Muay Thai basics. It was a great refresher for me to teach somebody else. As I watched her, and really thought about my punches and my form, I had flashbacks to my Krus (Kru is the Thai word for teacher). I remembered a lot of their notes to me about my stance and form. It's pretty easy to remember the basic rule they taught me, "keep your hands up at all times". Very often during pad work if I dropped my hands, they would surprise me with a quick smack to the head. In this rule, I became a quick learner.

Speaking of Muay Thai, I received a shirt I ordered the other day from Antarai Active Wear. It's hard to find Muay Thai related clothes, and almost impossible to find well designed clothes for women! I love a lot of the designs at Muay Thai Stuff but NO women's shirts! I wrote a complaint in the past to them about this. Anyway, I was surprised and delighted my shirt from Antarai came in so quickly! Can't wait to wear it!

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