Labral Terror

So after my last whiny post a lot has happened. I wrote that post on a Wednesday night and by Friday I had an appointment set up with a new orthopedic doctor. This was the doctor my coworker recommended to me months ago, but for some reason didn't go to. Now I wish I had, but hindsight is always 20-20. Dr. Schachter realized my problem right away. It was NOT "snapping hip syndrome" but most likely a labral tear. As defined by the MayoClinic: "A hip labral tear involves the ring of soft tissue that follows the outside rim of the socket of your hip joint. This ridge of cartilage, called a labrum, works a little like a suction cup to help hold your hip joint together."

Guess what sports are attributed to such a tear? Well among them are running, biking and kickboxing! Yay! We're thinking the combination of my naturally deep hip sockets with all the sports caused this tear to happen. An MRI confirmed the tear, and while they put contrast in my hip joint to show on the MRI better they also gave me a cortisone shot. It was SO worth the giant needle in my hip for 10 minutes. On one side of me was a doctor putting in the needle and on the other side was the x-ray image of my hip. The image would refresh every minute so I got to watch the needle go in deeper and deeper, then feel the fluid going into my hip and then watch the screen show the fluid dispersing. It was a highly unnerving experience. Also nobody tells you how LOUD an MRI is!! The protective headphones hardly masked the crazy sounds the machine made. I thought MRI's were these highly advanced silent machines but I was wrong.

So what happens next? Surgery. The day after my birthday to be exact. Last year on my birthday I rode 25 miles to celebrate my 25th year. This year I get crutches. I went to Dr. Schachter today for my final visit before the surgery. He explained that there is some hip impingement so along with fixing the labral tear they will do some very minor bone shaving. I actually got really lucky because in some cases of FAI there needs to be some significant alterations done to the bone. (Read more about FAI here.) I found out today that I will be staying in the hospital overnight because my doctor is worried I'll have adverse reactions to the anesthesia and get sick. Also, unlike my first and very shitty orthopedic, he has taken my gastritis into account.

When Dr. Schacter first told me I would probably need surgery I Googled the bejesus out of FAI. Instead of scaring me I actually found a lot of relief. I found my symptoms described in perfect detail. I found people who went on to do Ironman triathlons. I found a lot of encouragement and I also felt so much better! This post at www.understandingfai.com describes the writer's experience with her symptoms and I felt a weight of guilt lifting off of me when I read it. She too had intermittent and sometimes unbearable pain. I felt guilty because I thought that "snapping hip syndrome" could be fixed easily and that I must be doing something wrong because it wasn't getting better. I also felt guilty because some days it feels fine and other days it burns so bad, so I thought that the pain must be in my head. I must be the one making it out to be worse than it was. Chronic pain is an emotional roller coaster, and I'm ready to get off and enjoy the things I love to do again.

The recovery includes: 3 weeks on crutches and two weeks of this baby:

Look! She's loving it! And soon so will I! PT sessions probably twice a week for a couple of months and the doctor says I should be able to train again in about 4 months. I was hoping I'd be able to do a September triathlon but it looks like I will just have to wait until next year. The doctor wants me to be very careful and to "cool my jets" for awhile. A lot of people have seen the recovery A-Rod has made (who has this exact surgery... and I still think a douche bag) and think they can go back to running around in 6 weeks. Unfortunately since A-Rod exists had this surgery people have been increasingly getting tendinitis because they're pushing themselves too soon.

Despite the fact I need surgery I'm pretty optimistic. From what I've seen on blogs, people have gone to five or six orthopedics before finding a doctor that recognizes what this is. It is often misdiagnosed as snapping hip syndrome, hernia and other issues. Because it's a relatively new procedure there aren't that many doctors who do it. There's one guy in New York I keep hearing about, who is highly recommended except for the fact he takes CASH ONLY, UP FRONT. Um, sorry but I don't have $20,000 just hanging around. The other doctor who is "the best" is Dr. Philipon out in Vail, Colorado. Since finding out I need surgery I've had everyone giving me other orthopedics they've heard about. While I appreciate it, I'm happy with my current doctor. My coworker's brother-in-law is an orthopedic doctor who knows Schachter very well and I like that he is very thorough and cautious and treats me like a human being, which I've found to be a rare quality amongst doctors, especially orthopedics.

*It should be noted that "labral terror" is my boyfriend's amazing pun, not mine. I like to give credit where it's due. More of his amazingness can be found at this site.

Read more...

Low Point

This will probably be the most unedited, emotional mess of a post yet. I'm at a loss for what to do. I keep building myself up only to have the pain return. I dropped $200 on swimming stuff Tuesday. Flippers, kickboard, new goggles, 2 suits because I lost one and other is severely stretched out. Swam my first 1000 yards of the year, mostly with flippers, feeling like I was cheating having them on, but whatever my hips are weak. I took Advil later. The pain burned and gnawed at my groin for the rest of the day. Yeah. Groin. I have fucking groin pain. It's embarrassing and uncomfortable and so painful. Pain that just burns and feels like someone is pressing between my lady bits and the beginning my thigh. If I sit too long it hurts, if I walk too long it hurts, if my back isn't straight, if my legs aren't a certain way, it hurts. It hurts every fucking day and I'm just so sick of it.
I've been pouring time and money into PT. Into yoga. I try to do my exercises but then I'll have a day where I've gone to PT and it still burns, and I'm left wondering if I'm getting worse or better. Yoga hurt. Elliptical hurts. Swimming hurts. I just want to move again. My body is slowly turning all the muscle I worked so hard for, 2 hours a week for almost a year, and I'm watching it disappear every week that goes by. I haven't gained weight, but it's obvious my abs are weak again, my legs are no longer taut, it's just all going to shit. I know I should do ab work, and it would really help, but it's so hard to motivate myself to do it, to go to the gym especially when no cardio is involved. It's gotten to the point that I see runners as I drive around town and start to cry. Because I can't do that anymore. It all seems like another life. It's so stupid, so stupid to cry over a muscle injury. There are people out there with missing limbs, who have to have surgery, and yet here I am whining over this stupid, lame injury. I feel like a total dick and helpless at the same time. My boyfriend, who has been a saint, has been there to pick me up every time I have a day like this where I just fall into fits of frustration and tears. He's been amazing and I'm so sick of being Debbie Downer.
I want definite answers. I want someone to go "do this, this and this daily", and have it actually work. I hate these down days. I hate whining. I hate that it just takes over and I don't know how to deal with it.

Read more...

On the Mend

The new year is here and with it a lot of changes. As I briefly stated in my last entry, for the past few months I've been dealing with a hip injury. It started after my last triathlon. I was running more on the treadmill, trying to squeeze in workouts as best as I could. Hip pain would flare up soon after a run. I would stretch all sorts of ways, but nothing could stop the pain or burning. An hour or so after running on the treadmill 4mi I was limping so badly I could hardly walk. The next day I called up my physical therapist.

After a month of seeing no improvement I went to an orthopedic. At first the doctor told me to go to a gynecologist because he thought I had a hernia. He seemed to be taking guesses for a diagnosis. (BTW - he's a horrible doctor and I wouldn't recommend him to anyone.) He was about to leave when I asked, exasperated that I was losing my one chance at getting a physical therapy prescription, "WHAT ABOUT THE SNAPPING?!" He came over and said he didn't feel any snapping. So I rotated my leg the way I had learned that makes it snap, and it did, painfully. My eyes shut and my face tightened in pain. He looked down at me, unamused. "Ok. You have "Snapping Psoas Syndrome". Uh. What?

Well he was no help really explaining it so I did a ton of Google searching after I left his office. The smart explanation via http://emedicine.medscape.com:

(photo from : www.arthroscopichipsurgeon.com)

"The most common cause of a snapping hip is the iliotibial band snapping over the greater trochanter. This may be associated with trochanteric bursitis or with increased varus of the hip. The finding of a tight iliotibial band is common. Sudden loading of the hip (eg, landing after a jump) may reproduce this sensation of the iliotibial band subluxing over the greater trochanter. With sudden loading, the hip typically is flexed, causing the iliotibial band to move anteriorly followed by the tendon snapping backward as the individual recovers and extends the hip."

Basically, there's a muscle in my hip snapping over another muscle. The causes of SPS (BTW - Snapping Psoas Syndrome is also known as Snapping Hip Syndrome) are varied. My amazing physical therapist over at Excel Physical Therapy in Hamden, CT had the same injury from running and training for half marathons. Mine is an overuse injury as well. It's a bitch, but with a lot of work, is treatable. The added bonuses I had to make this ordeal more painful was 1. Hardly any hip flexor strength, and 2. Scar tissue developed in my groin to make up for the lack of hip flexor strength. I can think back over the years and remember all the times I stopped or skipped an exercise that dealt with hip flexor strengthening. Every time I tried these particular exercises my hip felt like it was grinding and snapping, the feeling made me nauseous as it was so strange.

It seems logical when you feel pain or grinding/snapping you would respond by stopping. Stopping turned out to be the exact wrong thing to do in this situation. I should have pushed forward, built up some hip flexor strength and I wouldn't be in this mess. Hindsight = 20/20. So I've been building up strength, little by little, and the snapping is less persistent. The constant burning feeling (which was bursitis) has lessened a great deal. My PT has broken up the scar tissue over the past few weeks with ultrasound and scraping (yes, scraping) at my groin with an object that looks like a wrist bone. As much progress as I've made, I still have to keep working at strengthening and stretching my hips before I can run. I have been going on the elliptical and today started a month trial of Bikram yoga.

Other than all that, this week is my first week of grad school. I'm going to the New School in New York City to obtain an MA in Media Studies. For now I will be staying in New Haven and commuting once a week into the city. My job has kept me on part-time, and I can't say enough how thankful I am that my company has been supportive of this decision.

Great blog post on helpful tight psoas exercises:
Low back pain while running... a real pain in the butt

Yoga Journal article 'Get Hip' which goes over some hip stretching poses, such as pigeon (shown above).

Read more...

Long Overdue Race Report - Trifitness Triathlon

I'll start my transition back to blogging with a "quick" overview of my last race. It was on September 20th. It's now 2 minutes after midnight on December 4th. Yeah. I'm a little behind. The last triathlon was my best! I can't believe how well I did. The day before the triathlon I went to what's known as the Big E. The "Eastern States Exposition" is New England's biggest fair, and it just so happens to take place in my original hometown of West Springfield, MA. I had fried dough, ice cream, cotton candy... total junk food. I woke up race morning skeptical I'd do well and with the intent to finish the race as best I could. Somehow I managed to completely kick ass.

The swim felt like it took forever, but that's how I always feel. There was a crazy sand bar on the way out, halfway to the first buoy. Most of the swimmers got up and started running across it, myself included. By the time we were swimming back to the shore, I had had enough. I was looking for girls from my team and just trying to keep up.

The bike was mostly me in rage mode. I just kept going as fast as I could, determined to pass any female ahead of me. I swore a couple times at people riding to the left, and generally being in my way. I was not a fan of how many corners we had to round. There was a girl who looked to be in my age group that I kept "playing with" the entire bike. Passing her was tough, but once I did I didn't see her behind me. Then she'd come up from behind, seemingly out of nowhere and pass me. There was one stretch I thought I'd never catch up to her. The entire bike I was cursing her, quite literally. On the last bit of road before the end of the bike we were so close. She passed me in the end and I felt a bit defeated.

The run transition was my worst, I think. I can't even remember anymore. I do know that I looked down at my watch during the first mile to see a 7:20 pace. WTFBBQ?! I freaked out and tried my best to keep up the pace. Passed a few team members and then I saw the girl from the bike ahead of me. As I passed her I said "That was great on the bike!" "Oh yea! You too! You really kept me going!" she said. "Me too!" Aww, look at that, we were nice girls after all. Seriously, without her I wouldn't have been able to go as fast as I did. Soon after I passed her I got a running stitch from hell. I struggled to the second mile. (Honestly how DO you triathletes run half/full marathons after a bike without cramping?!?!) I pulled it together around 2.5 and tried as best as I could to keep a decent pace.

Nearing the end I saw my mom up ahead. I thought she came out to support me on my run. Later I found out her and my boyfriend were snagged to volunteer and direct people on the run. My mom warbled her affections and support at the top of her lungs. Soon I came upon my boyfriend who was taking pictures of me while shouting support and compliments. He's kind of amazing.

Crossed the finish line with a flourish, flashing the metal sign in my cheesy arms in the air pose that has become my standard finishing style. Milled around for a bit and ate a gigantic apple. Before the awards ceremony I checked the results board. My jaw dropped and I checked it again. I got second in my age group! I refused to believe it. My parents and boyfriend were congratulating me and I kept saying, "Well just wait til the awards!" I was convinced there was a mistake.

There hadn't been a mistake. I really got second in my age group. My "secret" goal all year was to finish in the top 10. My first race I was close, and the second race was a total disaster. I have never been so proud of myself, and admittedly I'm getting misty typing this. For once in my life I worked my ass off and I achieved a goal. Not only achieved it, but surpassed it. Yes, overall I wasn't anything remarkable, but for a beginner I'm pleased with doing well in my age group. I'm also happy to say that the girl ahead of me in the age group is from my team and is also covered in tattoos. A guy on the bike even mistook me for her.

Thanks to that girl on the bike, I even placed first in my age group for the bike! She ended up being in the age group below me and placed third, I think. I can't remember. So that's that. My last triathlon of 2009. Right now I'm dealing with hip issues and have been going to physical therapy. My runs have gone from an average of 5 miles to just trying to make it to 15 minutes. I hope to resolve the issue soon and get back to training. There's been a lot more that's happened these past few months, but I'll write about that another time. Hopefully before 2010 rolls around.

Setting up my transition area, pretending to be perky.

This sums up my actual pre-race mood.

Promising my mom I won't punch any girls on the swim. (Honestly I have no idea what's going on here)

Smiling because my boyfriend just told me I look beautiful.

Just looked at the results board with my boyfriend/favorite race volunteer.

Full of pride and reeking of Sound water and sweat.

Read more...

I'm Not Dead

It's been three weeks since my last post. I was trying so hard to keep up with at least one post a week but things have been pretty crazy. I've lost my triathlon training momentum. Part of it is being completely burnt out. Another part of it is because I've begun a new relationship. Not typical of me to throw that out to the masses, but it's directly affecting my training schedule. Sometimes I care and I'm hard on myself about missing workouts. Mostly I'm just incredibly happy and could care less about triathlons, work, paying bills, putting out the recycling, laundry and so on...

I'm trying to gauge whether this slack in regimen is a good thing or if its telling me triathlons were never a priority. I tend to over think things but when I see my priorities change so quickly and dramatically it's hard not to draw conclusions. Been making time when I can, trying not to completely lose focus. I have a triathlon on the 20th and I can't wait for it to be over. I just don't want to think about racing for awhile.

Read more...

Urban Epic Mechanical Failure

Cambridge, race morning.

Sunday I raced the first ever Boston Urban Epic. It was a .5 mile swim, 10mi bike and a 4mi run. I prepared as much as I could for having my last/first race only a month prior. I signed up soon after Sobe Mossman, feeling confident and excited to race again. For some reason I couldn't shake a bad feeling about the race but who knows it was probably nerves.

I packed everything and checked my list over and over again before I left. I showed up in Boston on Saturday afternoon. As soon as I looked at my bike in my friend's apartment I realized my tire pump was gone. Did I leave it strapped to the bike and it flew off during my 90mph speeding? Maybe I had completely forgotten it. I tried to shake the jinxed feeling.

Pre-race, transition area.

Race morning I prepared just as I did for the Sobe Mossman. I ate the same Kashi bars and drank plenty of water. It was already in the 70s at 6am. Drove to the race, got marked, set up my transition station. I chatted with the girls around me who were all quite nice. Quickly became friendly with a girl named Liesbeth from Amsterdam, we walked to the swim start together.

The swim start was half an hour late, Liesbeth and I drank water they had provided. They only had huge jugs with no cups. We took turns pouring the water into the other's cupped hands. The sun was starting to beat down now and it was probably in the low 80s already. Our swim wave was small, I couldn't keep up with the fast girls and I was faster than the slow girls. I was in the middle and had no one to draft off of. The swim was supposed to be a straight line but at last minute it was changed to a giant curve. Halfway through I knew I was going much slower than last time.

Out of the water I got to T1 and I could feel myself fumbling. Why didn't I practice my transitions more? No bother, I calmed myself down and did my best. I got on the bike and started passing people. 20mph and I was feeling great. I got the first turnaround and headed back to the transition area. At first I was confused as to where the second turnaround was. For as many volunteers as they had, the expo parking lot turnaround was a dead zone. I started to feel my back tire sliding. Shit. A flat. I got to the transition area and screamed for a bike mechanic, I threw my bike down in frustration. It took five minutes for the bike mechanics to reach me. One started to work on it, and another took over, I had a bad feeling about this too. I gave him a tube I had and within a few minutes had the tire on, I went to get back on, the chain was off. I ran back to him and he fixed it.

I pounded my legs as fast as they could go. At this point I knew it was just about finishing, but I wanted to do my best. I wanted to make up some time. Passing people once again, I felt good. I really thought I could do it. Got to the first turnaround and again I felt the dreaded slide in my rear tire. I passed a guy and yelled, "Please, God, tell me I don't have a flat." He looked and grimaced, "Just keep pedaling and keep going as far as you can." Ugh, it was flat. I pedaled for awhile but got paranoid I'd do more damage to by bike. I got off, running in my cleats. I was breathing out of control, choking on each breath. Asthma attack plus fighting tears. Awesome. I was a wreck, screaming "bike mechanic" at every volunteer. No one had a walkie talkie. Finally someone with a walkie talkie asked for a bike mechanic. I began to take my tire off, but realized I'd just have to hold it. Some guy tried to talk to me but I snapped at him. "I'm just trying to help," he said. "I know... I'm sorry... this is my second flat okay?" The bike mechanic showed up 15 minutes or so later. He double checked my tire and wheel, no glass that he could see. He fixed it and I barreled toward the expo center. I passed a girl in my age group, got to T2 and threw my socks and shoes on.

At first I was running 7:20 miles. I wish I could have done that the entire run. I started to cramp. All the waiting and frustration, my adrenaline was depleted and so was my hydration. Before the first mile I began to choke. Asthma attack. A guy ran next to me for a bit, slowing his pace to see if I was okay. I kept choking on the air, making noises that scared me. I calmed myself down, the attack subsided and it was all about reaching the water station.

The run was so slow. 9 minute miles. I wanted to do so much better. I cheered people on as I passed them, joked with the staff. I tried my best to keep my head up and just finish. All I wanted to do was finish with some dignity intact. Finally, I got to the last 100 yards. Sand? Really? You've got to be kidding me. No mad proud dash to the finish line, just went as fast as I could through the sand. Liesbeth was at the finish line, and I was so glad to see a familiar face.

"Where were you?" "I had two flat tires!" "What?! No! I thought you'd finish before me!" Sigh. I wish. I have a feeling I could have been 5th had I not had the flat tires. So lessons learned. Make sure you have your pump (though I'm going to buy CO2 cartridges). Going to see if I can't get more practice changing a tire from the local bike shop. Going to practice my transitions more. I know I shouldn't have had to depend on the bike mechanics, and if I had everything my time would have been a bit better. Unofficial results said I passed four girls in my age group, but they must have been in the "beginner swim" wave which was an option. Beginner swim waves, BTW, in my opinion are bullshit. Just sayin'.

So shitty race. Bound to happen, right? Learn from your mistakes, can't win 'em all, you'll get 'em next time. I've heard all the cliches. I'm okay, or at least dealing. I made a new friend, even if she is going back to Amsterdam in 2 weeks, and it's nice to know there's another run-bike-swim-fighter out there (she does boxing). Most of the remainder of the day was spent in traffic. Took 2 hours to get from Boston to Rt. 84. On a good day it takes 2.5 hours to get from Boston to New Haven. Traffic in 90 degree weather? Glorious.

People have asked how the body marking looks on my tattoos. Answer:

...a mess.

With my race issues aside, the Boston Urban Epic was a great race. The marketing was so well done, and I think it really helped to draw a younger crowd. There were too many volunteers doing nothing on the main drag, they could have been dispersed better, like having more in the expo center turnaround. The volunteers had given up by the time I was running, and I got very confused as to where the course went. Not only were they not paying attention at this point, but their lack of care because most of the racers had crossed the finish line was REALLY disheartening. More signs were needed in the labyrinth that was the run's turnaround. The views on the run were great, the beach with all the boats took my mind off of how miserable I really was. My biggest gripe was that there should have been a shuttle from the finish to the transition area. Walking a mile or so after a triathlon BLOWS.

Read more...

Sake Guts, 10mi Run

Just a quick post. I've been remiss in my blog writing as of late. Trying to balance that whole "social life" with the training. I'm signed up for the Urban Epic which is a new race. A bit nervous since it's in Boston and I'm not too familiar with where the course is. It's this Sunday so I'm hoping to go up early on Saturday, pick up my packet and spend awhile getting intimate with the course.

I drank for the first time in months. I haven't had more than 2 beers since MARCH. So I drank like a fish, only to aggravate my gastritis. It hurts as bad as it did when the symptoms started. I've been downing antacids and Prilosec. I won't say that I can't believe I was so foolish. I don't feel foolish. It was only a matter of time before the stars aligned, the mood was right, for a fun night of drinking to commence. I wish I was better about it, but I refuse to be hard on myself about this. I'm suffering enough for it as is. Hopefully I will be back to normal by Wednesday.

Last Thursday I ran my first 10 mile run. I went out hoping for 6 miles, and I just felt so strong at 6 that I kept going. Taking sodium pills and Clif Margarita Bloks before runs have really helped to minimize cramping. My pace was alright too, with an average of 8:43. My longest run before Thursday was 8.5 miles at an 8:55 pace way back in March. I remember ending that run thinking that running any more than that was insane. This run felt way better, and though I hit a few slow patches, I also found some great bursts of energy. Those bursts may or may not have to do with the fact that the sodium pills I bought contain taurine. I didn't realize they had it until after I had bought them. Not sure how I feel about that as an added ingredient.

Running 10 miles in under an hour and 30 minutes felt like quite the accomplishment and I was happy for days about it. Still am. So now I don't think running 10 miles or more is insane, and it's starting to feel completely doable again. There may be a half marathon in my forseable future. I'm so thankful I'm a decent runner. I am such a slow swimmer, and below average on the bike, it's nice that I at least have the running down.

Read more...